Why Do Hotel Employees Say One Thing and Do Another?
There are conversations that stay with you because of how simple they seem, and how deeply true they turn out to be. I remember a conversation I had with a colleague, who said to me with a furrowed brow and frustration evident in his voice: “I don’t understand. Three team members did what we agreed on, what they learned in training. But two did something else. In the meeting, everyone said they would do the same. Why do they say one thing and do another?”
That question is the kind that tests our ability to understand what truly drives people within a team. Because in hospitality, it is not enough to train, inform and expect compliance. We need to reach something deeper. And that cannot be achieved through authority, but through understanding.
He was looking for a technical answer. Perhaps something from the leadership manual. But what we needed to find was a more invisible cause: the difference between what is necessary and what is not.
I asked him about something he did every day without particularly enjoying it. “I brush my teeth,” he replied. Not because he likes it, but because, to him, it is necessary. He does not question it. It is a habit; it is part of his personal culture. And that is what distinguishes someone who acts consistently from someone who merely nods along in meetings.
Ultimately, our operational culture is made up of what people consider necessary to do, even when no one is watching.
In a hotel, and even more so in independent or family-run hotels, the guest experience hinges on the details. But details are not cared for through control; they are cared for through awareness. That is why, when we talk about how to get a team to say and do the same thing, we need to understand one thing: it is not an information problem, but one of internal conviction.
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How can we foster that consistency? Here are a few principles I have discovered over the years:
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Turn training into a habit, not an event.
Most hospitality training sessions are short and quickly forgotten. The key is not to repeat the content, but to repeat the behaviour. Intentional repetition creates culture. If we train only once, we do not create a habit; we create a temporary illusion of alignment. -
Reinforce the right behaviours socially.
People do not act solely out of conviction, but also through observation. If three colleagues do things well and that is made visible, recognised and linked to something more than a pat on the back, others will tend to adapt. -
Connect every action to its purpose.
When someone deviates from a procedure, it is often because they do not understand why that procedure matters. The question is not “how is it done?”, but “why do we do it this way?”. Clarity of operational purpose is what turns a standard into conviction.
So, why do they say one thing and do another? Because it does not yet feel necessary to them. Because they have not integrated it as a habit, because they have not felt the impact of failing to do it, because they do not yet live it as culture.
As team leaders in the hospitality industry, we cannot settle for issuing guidelines or creating protocols. Our task is more complex —and more beautiful—: to instil an internal sense of necessity, create visible habits and build a shared culture.
A guest notices when things are done simply to comply, and when they are done out of conviction. And that, of course, has consequences for the experience, reputation and results.
At the end of the day, no one needs to be shouted at to do the right thing. They need to believe that doing the right thing is part of who they are as professionals.
And that, my friend, is not taught in a meeting. It spreads through example.
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